Sister WivesstarKody Browngets a bad rap sometimes, but he has a softer side -Kody can be a very romantic person- in fact, in the show’s recent Tell-All sneak peek,he admitted that his feelings for Robyn were so intense that they took him by surprise, and that confession made it seem like he was playing a little violin again. Yes, Kody has occasionally indulged in self-pity, but who hasn’t? The point is that he may be using a sob story about his great love to influence others.
If so, his statements could be more about shaping a narrative than telling an important truth about his life. However, he could be opening up in a way that’s truly honest. If so, that’s admirable. Kody’s well aware of the devastation thatpreferring one wife (Robyn)brought. He has lost so much, and he really believes that his love, which he couldn’t control, destroyed his family.
They’re Now His Exes
Kody may have thought that he lovedhis now-exes, Meri, Janelle and Christine Brown, but maybe he didn’t know what the real thing felt like. The feelings he had for the other didn’t compare with how he felt about Robyn. As soon as he started courting her, it seemed like he was walking on air. This was love,with all of its intoxicating euphoria! Kody began acting so different - suddenly, he was living for Robyn alone. It may have seemed like a crush at first (something intense that isn’t destined to last), but it was so much more.
It’s quite possible Kody has never felt that about anybody else in his life. In another world, this would be a best-case scenario… chemistry so powerful it just takes over, binding two people together. However, there was a real problem here, and that was the fact that three other wives also wanted a husband.
It was terrible luck that Kody was in this situation - disentangling himself would not be easy. He had too much responsibility as a husband of three (and then four, when he married Robyn). All of his children by those mothers were also a factor, holding him back from really living out what was in his heart. To extricate himself, when he was the beating heart of the family, powering the body as the “man of the house,” would require the most delicate surgery. Unfortunately, his hands weren’t deft enough to perform that operation without serious complications.
He Just Couldn’t Win
He waited too long, perhaps. Above, see Janelle reaching her breaking point - all the ex-wives did that. Kody probably had the best intentions - he felt he should stay with the women he didn’t love. That doesn’t make him a villain. They should have let him go.
Everyone who was a spouse in that marriage is an adult, and all must bear responsibility for turning away from the truth. To villainize Kody and paint the now-exes as angels isn’t fair, either. They knew what was happening, and perhaps a desire for financial security led them to make unromantic choices. Feelings were real, but there were other concerns. The situation was a powder keg.
In a situation like this, the practical is at war with the romantic, and when the plural marriage went on and on,it was probably because practical needs won out. However, what’s inside a person (the emotions that drive them) can’t be suppressed - feelings always comes out somehow. So, there were fights,there was Robyn’s passive-aggression, there was a general atmosphere of misery, all founded on operating under the illusion that things were normal, when everyone knew it was more or less a charade.
Emotions need space to be expressed -a safe space to be felt and understood. Robyn’s were, as Kody loved her. But the other women had to go it alone emotionally. Kody had to live with the guilt of being the man who denied them, but on the other hand, he probably wondered why they couldn’t just leave. Why did he have to initiate it? In fact, he waited, trying to get them to take the step he wouldn’t take.
Eventually, they did, but again, it all went on for much too long, and those bad memories cast very dark shadows. Hopefully, all parties are mature enough to rise above all of this turmoil. They should be.
The Breakups Were Emotionally Grueling
Kody Was Rattled & He’s Still In HIs Feelings
In the end, the process of breaking those bonds was a messy and scary business. So many broken hearts, so much bitterness, and a sense of unreality - how could things change so much?What would life be like for everyone when America’s most famous plural family was fractured? There was plenty at stake - money, for one thing.Sister Wivesis a cash cow. Then, there were the ex-wives, forced to start over in midlife. Then, there were childrenexcluded from Robyn’s"core family"with Kody - they had to deal with the horrors of a broken home.
Lots of people survive divorces - however, this unusual relationship model, which works for some families, added so much complexity.
It’s important to consider Kody’s point of view. His story matters - it’s not just about the ex-wives. Men have feelings too - so many emotions that society often pressures them to hide.They are still there, thrumming under the surface.Kody, plunged into polygamy, certain it was right. People made him believe that.
While he probably thought his future was predictable, an event he didn’t see coming changed everything, throwing all his plans awry. That event was meeting Robyn. Then, the nightmare that was losing his child, Garrison Brown, left him desolate. This story is sad, and no one should envy Kody, but they can at least try to see things from his point of view.
In every life, there are these types of events - pivotal moments that alter the landscape, and even seem to change the universe forever. In Kody’s case, before Garrison passed, it was love. and that shouldn’t be a bad thing. However, there were just too many issues - he couldn’t freely love Robyn. In the sneak peek, he said,
“I fell in love, hard.”
This was remarkably honest. Its simplicity says it all. While it could be argued he was playing the victim, it’s more likely that this is something he feels compelled to say simply because it’s true. He wants people to understand him. Everyone wants to be understood.
Sister Wives' Kody Browndoesn’t believe that polygamy can thrive after an emotional event like falling passionately in love with one wife, and maybe he’s right. It’s a matter of how people behave - Kody couldn’t go through the motions. He was too romantic, wanting the fairytale with Robyn. So, maybe he deserves some grace. He just couldn’t give the other wives a convincing performance, and maybe that’s actually a sign of a good heart. Faking love was impossible.
The other wives could have said, “enough” but theSister Wivesstars chose to stick around. Everyone was an adult who recognized what the dynamic was. Now that Kody’s trying to make peace with his exes, grantingMeri and Janelle larger portions of Coyote Passbefore its sale, it may be time for the Browns to put their hard feelings aside. Life is too short for this - people should be with the ones they love, and let other people be.
